“Why is Mexico such a terrible place, Dad?”

I choked a little in surprise, “What are you talking about, Lydia? Who said Mexico is a terrible place?”

She motioned at the screen, “Look at it. It’s horrible, Dad. And why do all of the Mexicans want to kill you?”

“These?” I pointed at the screen. “These things here? Sweetie, those aren’t Mexicans. Those are Goombas. Mushroom people. They want to kill me because they work for Bowser, and Bowser is the bad guy that kidnapped the princess.” I paused the game. “Okay, what in the world made you think this was Mexico?”

She rolled her eyes and shook her hands in the air. “Every time you start a new level the little man yells ‘MEXICO!'”

“No. No no no no… Lydia. …For one… that little man is MARIO, and what he yells is ‘Let’s-a Go!’. You know, like ‘Let’s go!'”

She blinked at me.

“Let’s-a Go!” I sang, and then cleared my throat. “…Because he’s Italian…”

She raised her eyebrows and tilted her head in disbelief.

I turned back to the TV. “Okay, you know what? This is Mexico. The Mexicans are trying to kill me because I’m an agent of the CIA and I’m trying to disrupt their economy by stealing all of the coins they have hidden in these brick safes.”